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[rassera]

"Oi, it's me. Leave something here, would ya?"

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[amadaman]

Mm.

[Again with the hollow answer, immediately after opening up. Ken stares down at his bare feet, watching the water continue to drip from his hair despite his (half-hearted) attempts to dry it. As he responds to Kaneda, he's trying to drill the words into his own mind, to not think any other way.]

They'll come back. I know... and he wouldn't want me sad, either.

I'll be okay.

[rassera]

Right.

[Kaneda's voice hitches up a little, as if trying to bring a cheerful side to this. That egg cracks, splitting and letting the whites and yolk fall into that bowl as he starts to stir it with chopsticks.]

It's Dip's job to worry about that kind of stuff, not yours!

[But he knows Ken, and he knows that tone he takes when he is only SAYING he's going to be okay.]

...

Just keep an eye on the comm. You know them, we ALWAYS know when they're back from one of those little trips home.

[amadaman]

Yeah, I know.

[Ken's going to have his comm on him all the time, without fail. It'll be glued to his hand, and he'll sometimes be so caught up in watching it he'll forget everything else.]

... I think I'm gonna go get--

[changed, is what he wanted to say, except when he turns, he doesn't realize that Koromaru is right there. He also forgets that the floor is wet, and that his feet are slippery. Completely caught off guard -- and not thinking quickly enough to react to his own situation -- Ken falls on the floor with a splat and a thud as he also hits a chair going down.]

[rassera]

[The 'thud' makes Kaneda drop everything he's working on, practically spilling the egg onto the counter as he sets the chopsticks down and pivoting on his heel. What the--oh god.]

Oh, hell.


[Ushering Koromaru gently out of the way, he scrambles over to Ken's fallen body, leaning down to scoop the kid up easily from the hard floor. You'd never guess, but his heart may have skipped a few beats there.]

Today's just not your day, is it.

[amadaman]

[For how small and frail he can look, Ken's pretty sturdy. He's not hurt badly and would insist he isn't hurt at all, save for hitting his face on the floor when he went down. Already some red is rising in his forehead and nose, and he rubs at the latter in a disgruntled manner as Kaneda sits him up.]

... I slipped, [he announces unnecessarily.]

And I think I'm kind of cold... Are you making dinner?

[rassera]

Mmmhmm. Keihan.

[Once Ken's at least situated himself for the most part, Kaneda helps him to his feet, grabbing that towel off the chair and handing it to him.]

So you better hurry and change--


[Shit.]


...On second thought, take your time.

[amadaman]

Huh?

[Ken was just considering changing into his pajamas, making some tea, and warming up with Koromaru. But Kaneda is making him food, and whatever it is, it sounds and smells delicious. He looks up at him in confusion, wondering why the change of mind.]

Um... okay. I can shower, then?

[rassera]

Yeah, just don't rush. You'll trip and break your face.


[He smiles down at Koromaru, giving him a nod as if to say "Look out for him."]

I'll have it on the coffee table, yeah?

[amadaman]

[Koromaru responds with a wag of his tail, already trotting off to go make sure there's nothing in his room Ken's going to fall on.]

Yeah.

... Thanks, Kaneda-san. I'll be down in a bit.

[rassera]

[With a smile, his hand ruffles that hair, directing him towards the stairs.]

Off you go.

[As he moves to retreat to the kitchen once more.]

[amadaman]

[Ken moves slowly upstairs so he doesn't trip over a cat or his own two feet. Fortunately, there's no sudden crash or scream while he's gone; he's got some semblance of a hold of himself now, so he's able to navigate the shower safely. He'll come back downstairs in fifteen or so minutes, warmer and cleaner and a little bit calmer. He remembers to go to the coffee table instead of wandering aimlessly.]

Kaneda-san?

[rassera]

[By the time Ken makes his way back down to the ground floor, a bowl of food has been left on the coffee table as promised--two, actually, although one is currently in Kaneda's hands as he sits on the opposite end of the couch, feet propped up on said table and watching...some kind of samurai show.

He forgets which one. They all have something to do with honour.

The bowl consists of keihan, with chicken and mushrooms and egg sliced up, with vegetables and then rice underneath it all. Something simple and divided so Ken could eat a little bit of everything.]

Hmm?

[amadaman]

[It looks... normal. The way Kaneda is just sitting there and eating, the television blaring some show that'll run again next week, and the week after that. Like routine. But Ken knows well that even something like this could vanish in the blink of an eye. It's nighttime soon. If they go to bed tonight and wake up tomorrow, how many of them would be here?

He doesn't say anything. Just watches him for a few more seconds -- the samurai on the television yells and slashes at his enemy, who falls in a dramatic, flailing mess -- before he tears his eyes away, shaking his head and shuffling over. When he sits next to him on the couch, he sits just a little bit closer than usual.]

... Thanks.

[rassera]

[Kaneda notices, and watches as Ken makes himself comfortable on that couch, watching the way he shuffles closer to him than he usually did. It's not unexpected--he knew that Ken would need someone close to him.

But that doesn't mean Kaneda should draw attention to it either way.]

Didn't trip or anything, right?

[His eyes search Ken's face, both looking for new redness and trying to read it or anything underneath.]

[amadaman]

No. I was okay.

[That one fall was enough to jolt him into functioning enough for that. Instead of the proper manners he usually was adamant about -- keeping the bowl near the table, not slouching -- he picks up the bowl and draws his feet up on the couch as is most comfortable for him and starts to dig in.]

We were supposed to meet up today.

[rassera]

[At least Ken doesn't have to worry about impressing anyone--Kaneda's the trashbag with his feet on the table, anything Ken does is a step up from that. But seeing him eat is a good sign, and he can't help but let his shoulders relax a bit once he sees him start to dig in.

It's not much, but he can stop the poor guy from slacking on his basic needs.]


You'll just have to give him hell when he's back.


[He speaks so confidently...hoping that some of it will reach Ken.]

[amadaman]

[Even Ken knows he has to eat the minimal amount. He's not allowed to stop moving. He always has to keep moving forward, and Kala-Nemi is there to keep him going. He has no real desire to eat, still, but the food is good and he was physically hungry, so he eats. But while his eyes water as he does and little tears drip into the bowl, he stays silent, holding on tightly to himself because he isn't sure he could come back together if he fell apart right now.]

... Yeah. [His voice comes out strained and he takes a big mouthful of rice to avoid talking.]

[rassera]

[If Ken were ever worried about falling apart...well, an arm loops around those shoulders of his, hand securely on his opposite arm. A warm, almost TOO warm body presses close to him, hand moving up to run through that mess of brown hair.

Kaneda had certainly gotten touchy over these last few months, but a lot of it was because Ken needed it. And maybe because he needed a little bit of it too.]

Write him notes if you have to.


That usually always brings em back.


[He smiles, pushing his cheek against that hair as he holds his bowl with the other hand, swirling it idly.]


Worked with you.

[amadaman]

I might. I might... I dunno.

[He sniffs and finally raises an arm to scrub at his eyes. His face will be red from it, but Kaneda already knows he's crying.]

I hope they're okay.

[rassera]

[Kaneda's eating slows, stirring a little with his chopsticks as he tries to think of what to say. He can't guarantee anything--and Ken knows that.


There's a soft clearing of his throat, breathing out just a little bit.]

It's hard not thinking of what could happen or how long they'll be gone.

[amadaman]

[He doesn't want to cry anymore, here, so he quiets, sniffles again, and lowers his hand to grab his chopstick again. It's hard to tell if he's tasting anything, the way he starts to shovel the food into his mouth.]

If-- if I knew that they'd be fine at home, I would've been okay with them leaving.

[Heartbroken, yes. But... nothing lasted. He knew that better than he knew anything else. And at least they would be safe.]

Not knowing hurts.

[rassera]

[It's hard to watch, Ken only keeping himself up by his will to go on alone, with nothing left but the walls of a mostly hollow house.]

Yeah...

[But how does he bring a bright side to that?]

But not knowing that they'd be in trouble hurts more, right? I mean, you know that.


[He quiets again, not sure if that's...REALLY any better.]

It's something.

[amadaman]

They always talked about getting in trouble. They kept getting arrested here, too. They're stupid. They do a lot of stupid stuff.

But it was never.. they always acted like they'd be able to get out of anything, except that time.

[rassera]

They're more trouble than you are, and that's saying something.

[His face attempts a smile, but it's painfully forced as poking at his keihan.]

...Is it that bad?

[amadaman]

I know the feeling of facing an enemy and realizing there's no way to win. When you can't see anything but defeat...

We still fought, because we had nothing to lose. But Dipper and Mabel are different. They have... they have family that are waiting for them. Dipper said he missed their parents.